Been doing a bit well. Moved in to our new place last November. Kahit maliit lang yung bahay I love it because I'm finally with my own family. Gilly and I went through a charade but I'm glad he's grown out of it. I'm glad he doesn't snap on me on things he doesn't understand. Although we're east and west, we manage to meet at some point.
With work.. ugh!! I think it's the right move to MOVE ON. I fell in love with the company and the business itself, but I still get the sense of being enslaved.. I don't want to elaborate anymore. I know how I should be treated as an employee. And I know I should abandon the ship before I sink with it! It's bad enough that most of the people there (majority of the 2o-something) are the most negative and naive creatures I've ever met.. i know how this sounds, but I just can't take it anymore..
Been reading the novel of Audrey Niffenegger lately. Not because the motion picture is out but because I had the money at the moment. Good thing I was able to cancel my very first order at Tradeport.ph. With the shipping fee it would have cost me Php 539. Thanks to my luvey Powerbooks {who texted me once stocks of THE book arrived} I got The Time Traveler's Wife for Php 334 since they were on sale! Talk about a god buy! :)
The novel was written in the shadows of Audrey Niffenegger's past lovers. A direct metaphor for the ups and downs of love, time, relationhips and inevitable act of fate.
Okay tama na yan. A lot have happened- sa office, sa bahay, sakin, samin.. But as always, I am grateful for the life experience God has been bestowing on me. Life experiences are blessings
and opporunities to be a better person. =)
I got a dorm/ apartment around Pasig. Very accessible to work. I still feel lonely sometimes. I guess I know I shouldn't be living this life anymore. It's a good life, but I'm not a single independent woman anymore. See I'm already a mom, and have been deprived of so many things. I am a wife but not in paper. I can wait for that. What I need right now is home with my own family. I am still independent of course, pero syempre alam ko kasi na hindi na dapat ito ng buhay na tinatahak ko kaya ramdam ko yung kulang.
May mga taong bwisit paring hindi tumitigil at mukang di na talaga ako tatantanan. Mga taong witches sa buhay ko. Pero ang inaganda ng existence nila ay naiukumpara ko ang mga traits na gusto ko at mga traits na dapat itapon. Hindi ko masisisi ang mga taong yun. Tulad nalang ng feeling mature na neneng na pilit jina-justify ang mali nyang hindi nya matanggap. At buong pagkataong pinagmamalaki na mature na sha. Natatawa nalang ako. I'm not saying na I'm the most mature person in the world or that I'm better than anyone else. Pero sana don't stick your nose whre it doesn't belong. Kasi mapapahiya ka lang in the end. Wag ka na makisawsaw sa mga bagay na hindi ka namn involved. Kahit na ba involved ang mga taong mahal mo, eh kung ikaw mismo epal lang I suggest you stay out of the way. You're not doing anyone or anything any good. hehe Puro any.
My lola had a stroke due to high blood pressure. Atleast hindi dahil sa heart attack. Nailipat na sya sa St. Luke's and according to my mom, she's getting better. May reunion pa naman this september and another one on october.
I fell in love with this disney movie. I am a disney kid talaga. I remember my cousins and I used to watch a lot of disney flicks during reunions! hehe I miss being a kid. Good thing marami paring magagandang disney movies and shows today.
I watched UP with Gilly (as usual), and sure enough it made me cry. haha I'm such a sucker for drama! haha The movie's about adventure in life and love and being satisfied with what you have. I know how it sounds. But it reflects the trth in the hardships of life, postponed dreams and life on hold. I love the part where there were no dialogues at all. Until the movie skipped to their senior life. I also loved the part where Carl (the old man of a few words), opened Elli's old scrapbook and found out that she lived the adventure she needed and that the simplicity of the life they lived is happiness enough.
I don't understand why people comment on my weight when they see me. I'm not the heaviest. Im not the scrawniest (and I mean cmpared to the group!) but people always had to say : "pumayat ka" or "sumesexy ka na!", as if my world revolves around my weight or as if all I care about is my looks. Kasi kung ganun lang rin ako kababaw or ka-shallow eh di sana parati akong well-groomed or sana anorexic nako (meaning naka-develop na ko ng mental illness gawa ng obsession sa weight). Kaso hindi.. I don't assign people to monitor my weight or appearance everytime they bump into me. Buti sana kung normal thing nalang yun or tradition yun (which is stupid by the way), or kung ginagawa rin yun sa ibang tao sa paligid ko. Kaso hindi.
Sa ilang taon kong pag-o-obserba, ako lang ang ginaganun. Di naman ako manhid para ma-deadma yun ng ganun nalang. Napaka-obvious para sabihing "wala lang yun, nagkataon lang". Nagkataon?! haha Grabeng odds namankung nagkakataon lang.
Enlighten me.
Kapag kapatid mo, ok lang na utusan mo or hingan mo ng favor kahit inaasar mo sya or kahit may sabihin kang mean. Kapatid mo yun eh. I'm not saying it's right, but there's a special privilege kapag magkapatid kayo at kayo-kayo ang nagaasaran or nagco-comment ng di maganda sa isa't-isa. Pero pag ibang na tao na, at bigalng sasabihing ; "eh may kwenta rin pala tong si BLANK eh!" or "BLANK! Palitan mo yun ha, bumili ka sa labas nun!" iba na dating diba? Kasi pag kapatid mo wala kang purely evil intentions, may awkwardness lang to show your affection which is completely normal. Kumbaga kapag inasar mo yung kapatid mo dahil malaki ngipin niya or madami siyang pimples, hindi ka nasasaktan at hindi mo intensyon na maoffend siya, lambing mo lang yun. Pero pag narinig ang mga nasabing pang-aalaska sa ibang tao maiinis ka o magagalit ka at ipagtatanggol mo ang kapatid mo kahit totoong malaki ngipin o tenga niya.
Enlighten me.
May anak na ako. Hindi pa kasal. May plano pero mas pinili namin ng asawa ko na unahin ang gastos sa bata. WERRRNGKKK!!!!! Rewind! Asawa? Hindi pa kasal di ba? Bakit asawa? By paper syempre hindi, technically hindi kami binded by God or binded simply by marriage. Pero kung may anak na kayo, nagmamahalan {given the differences and quabbles}, ano kayo? Mga magulang ng anak ng isa't- isa? hahahahahahahaha Or are the two of you "just friends"?? isa pang hahahahahahhahahah! Sa mata ng mga oldies, lalu na yung mga sarado ang utak (yes merong hindi ganyan kahit parehong circa sila ng mga tinutukoy kong mga old folks), or yung mga traditional lang talaga, mga by the book kumbaga. Pero what's the deal with witches and their "questions"? Ano ba talaga ang intensyon ng mga tanong nila? Kasi natanong na nila dati itatanong ulit. hehe Specifics? E.g kapag hindi ko kasama si gilbert dahil may work sya or may family thing sila, hahanapin. "Si gilbert?", "San si gilbert?".. *sigh* Ako naman sasagot ;"Nasa QC po" or "may work po".. isa pang *sigh* Ano ba gusto niyong palabasin dibah?? Ngayon niyo lang ba nalaman na may anak na kame at ganito sitwasyon namin? Hindi diba? So why the stupid questions? {note: example lang yan. delikado kapag nilahad ko yung mga grabeng interrogations}.
I went home today cranky, sweaty, wanting to take a bath for the nth time. I feel like my day's wasting away with the whole sweaty country! Then I stumbled with a pretty pathetic site. Her a.k.a "the little bitch's blog"! Well, i must pull the "oops!-she-did-it-again" line to her on the count of she did do it again.
When you write or say or do something which is not exactly nice to someone you don't expect good karma to come your way stupid! Saying this is useless, but i'll say it again- "With every action comes an equal reaction". I don't know why she just couldn't get it. But hell, if she's just a pseudomaturity-police then she can arrest any suspected immature little skank like herself.
Like hello? If someone already has responsibilities you should know better than to rant your ass off especially if you think that you're real mature boney!
Just when i thought the skipping dvd of my much-awaited how-i-met-your-mother marathon couldn't be more suckier than anything else, i stumble upon the least stable person i ever met. *sigh*
I'll just eat my chilled cherry jell-o... I'll look better tomorrow, feel better, be more mature than your little rat's ass. hehehehehehhehehhehehe
well, for starters i left my job na. the morning after i resigned it felt like breaking up with a boyfriend. haha it reminded me talaga how it's like. natatawa nalang ako. umulan pa. haha kasi nung unang panahon, as ironic as it is, everytime i break it off with a guy it would always rain. kaya coincidence talaga. Pero like break-up scenarios, no regrets.
Nakaka-touch lang kasi tablahan ang drama sa opisina haha as in nung una parang di na nila ako pinapansin, tapos nung nag-email ako ng kalokohan balik sa dati na at nagreply pa ang mga bruha. hehe nakakatuwa lang kasi with a stint as short and a resignation as sudden, andami ko na agad nakaclose. Nakakamiss talaga. I'm really happy though, i mean everytime i get to sacrifice like this.. not a soul can sense i'm happy with the decision i made coz it wont show and i wont deliberately show it. It's worth it kasi. Now that i have all the time i need right now for my kid, grabe yung euphoria. Of all the things that i've written in my book of life, this aspect of euphoria is the best one yet. I'm no over-achiever kasi, no title connected to my name... hmmm but as i said i don't need a title to feel good about myself. still not aiming to be complacent okay. hehe it just feels best when i just am. not trying to be anything other than- well, what i am.
Talked to a friend working in the company i'll be working for, and i'm looking forward to my first day {20th of April}. Atleast may clearer grasp na ko ng mga duties ko/ job description. I'll know what to expect na. Pag nakaipon naman ako business venture na {as I've been plotting since highschool}. :p
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I loved our weekend getaway at Tuguegarao! Posted pictures at multiply na. Grabe i wanna go back hehe Kaso gastos hehe oh well, someday i'll get to travel big time.
I'm destined for greatness. Success is not defined by the girth of your wallet or size of your bank account, it is how you can see perfection in a world where the only perfect thing that exists is the word ("perfect") itself.
I have a job which I've learned to love, and i'm so at home already. It's only been a month but i feel like i've been working here for a year! No, my colleagues are not maldita, not at all! i actually fell in love with them in an instant. i know it seems too soon and some may even think i'm exaggerating, but boo yah! im not. All the people I've talked to say one thing. That you stay here not for the salary, may be for work, but mainly you stay because of the people, the camaraderie... I'm actually enjoying myself. I don't feel the hassle of working overtime (and i'm happy coz i can charge it like that yihee). So why the drama???
Here's the flipside of the story- October of 2008 I applied for a job as a Financial Analyst at ***&*&*&*, they said I got in but I wasn't able to come on board because it's an american company and everyone knows the dealy-yoh with the economic crisis so their action point is to go on freeze hiring and they were left w/ no choice but to reshuffle. I got pretty disappointed but what can I do? They told me that once new projects come their way they'll hire me on the spot.
March 04, 2009 I received an email from their Operations Manager inviting me for an interview. Man I was pretty psyched about it coz I got a hunch of what it's about. March 11 I was set for an appointment with their country manager, one of their big bosses. I was really flattered with everything he said. He even told me that he remembered me well coz I was the one who did all that research. I did. :) And I guess all those preparations paid off. He knew I didn't have any financial background. Though he knew that I worked for one of the largest multinational banks. He was actually the SVP of that same bank years back. He knew my former bosses still. He asked me to choose from the three new projects they have. Apparently they're ramping up and the expansion includes me in his mind. Me? Being pirated by some big shot boss? who da thunk? lol
Long story short..... He put a price on the table. Money-wise, I'd take it. But as I said, I love what I'm doing right now. That's why I can't decide!
originally, i applied for a marketing assistant position. Im willing to start at square one, but fortunately they endorsed me to an officer position. Im proud of myself for being able to be seen as such. Mas gusto ko pa yung responsibilities ng bago kong trabaho. Best part is- I have my own spacy cubicle! hehe As in I can put chorvaleys on my desk, on my bulletin board hehehe Simple lang masaya na ko hehe It may not be as glamorous as HSBC but I know I'll love it in my new office. :)
Medyo kinakabahan lang ako baka kasi malditahin ako ng mga bagong colleagues ko or baka may ma-miss ako sa job, wag naman sana!! hehe I'll be starting monday next week. :)
i wish you could step back from that ledge my friend..
haha i watched yes man (finally!) and it's better than watching benjamin button. before you go spaz out or something let me tell you that YES MAN is a feel-good movie that's why. I can also watch Benjamin Button by borrowing a copy from my cousin- so boo! haha
Gilly & i met at hypermart near tiendesitas. he let me pick the movie this time. We originally planned on watching "The curious case of Benjamin Button". The title was so long that they had to cut it short to fit the board, so there goes "Benjamin" on it. hehe which by the way takes 3 hours (2 hours and 45 minutes to be exact), so i chose Yes Man..
Basically Carl Allen got himjself hooked up on a programme which forces a person to say yes to everything, but turns out he didn't use it right. So he ended up making the wrong decisions and hurting some people along the way. What's so cool and ironic is - it's so cool and ironic! haha It's like fate is in on it. Plus the fact that Carl (Jim Carrey) got his mind all mixed up he lost a bit of control. It's really funny and as usual, only Jim Carrey can pull it off!
I was reminded of my old self. The one I liked. The one I'm happy with. I was reminded that just because I had my baby doesn't mean I can't live anymore. Plus, Gilly finally realized how I define FUN.
I missed the time when detractors didn't exist in my world. I missed the time when I didn't know they even existed. I guess it's really about time to stop fighting back and start stepping up.
:)
But yes, I relate to Yes Man. Thanks to some fatso faggot I can live again. *grin*
Gawd this movie has affected me so much in a good way! haha It even made me do 4 consecutive cartwheels on the parking area!!! seriously. {Coz if you may not know, doing cartwheels after a good movie is my thing, and yeah, Gilly just lets me do it ehehehe}
I'm really excited for next month, not because I'm getting rid of my mom {course not!} but basically because I'll be able to take charge and handle the household income. I can cook whatever I want and buy home decors I've been eyeing. :) But it also means that there'll be less people in the house kaya medyo worried ako when I go to work. I'm even opting to hire a temporary security guard. My mom and my kuya will be in Canada for 2 whole months! Gilly can't come home every weekends. hmm Actually it's possible for my fiance to come home during the weekends...
Anyway, I just made Peaches and Cream Ref cake, hehe It's a hit kahit malambot pa at dipa masyado nagse-set excited kumain mga tao dito hehe. I'm happy my Uzuri's home with me. :)) So far, with my life, I can say I'm contented. *sigh
I did something i kind of regret. But I'm gonna own up to it as I should. I didn't say anything mean or bad directly at other people, but obviously someone got really affected. She-man (as I wanna call him), kept on interrogating me about the blind items whom I have negative feelings at. First of all, I am in the right position to feel bad because they've been doing things to me and my family for years. It's about time I speak up. I didn't drop names, I didn't say mean things, and I didn't curse. I just expressed my angst and pain. Now, it's just a bit abnoxious for him or them to feel they are being attacked when they are simply being confronted. My take on it was even so vague that noone would really be affected unless they are guilty of somehthing. I could go on and on about their wrongdoings but I'm choosing not to this time.
What's really ridiculous is that Sheman is still yapping as if nothing ever happened. One word. Plastic. Then he went sliding in questions and trying to wring out info. Diss the dirt man! {or should I say "girl"?}
Amplastik talaga. The fruit doesn't fall far from the tree talaga.
On the lighter end, I'm just trying to get over it. I know when to stop. I know I shouldn't feel bothered anymore, it only means they're guilty.
I've been in a bit of a trance lately.. haha I can't believe after all these years I'm gonna be saying this line again!
I know by now I should be an all-contented, stay-where-you-gon-be, be-what-cha-hafta-be mommy. But I'm human. That never changed.
I like someone. But I never really gave the thought much attention coz I know I never wanna lose what I have. To me it's just some stupid, harmless crush and I always assure Giily of that. But I guess it's about time I face it and not always undermine issues that I feel are too absurd to feast on. Right now I just need something to break the monotony of things {without being polygamous!!!}. I'm misunderstood already, I don't need my imperfections to be emphasized all the more. About liking this guy, I told Gilly about it and he just took his usual deep breaths whenever I tell him stuff similar to this one. Gilly.... for me... is.. to good to be true. I mean he's the ideal life partner if you want someone faithful, loyal and attached. He's a gent and you'd think he's the closest thing to perfect! But that's just it. That's what's wrong with the picture. He's too good for me. I'm not having self-pity moments. I'm just being real. Sure he has flaws too, but bottomline? He's not for me. He's not exactly my ideal life partner. We do get along, but more often than not I see him as the bestest friend a girl could ever have. And the fact that he's too good or he's the ideal husband/ boyfriend to most girls gives me more reasons to stay. I've been hesitating to leave for a long time (especially now that we have a kid), but it hurts when I feel or see him hurting. I know he doesn't deserve that, I know he doesn't deserve me.
We had a little squabble about this. I told him I can't really deal with it knowing it's hurting him. He told me it's better to face it no matter how hurtful it may get, get it over with and move on. He told me to think about it. Told me to find out if I really love him like that. All these so I can find my happiness. I deserve it, I know I do. I'm one of the few who knows what they want and does something about it. But I'm not as selfish as everyone thinks. That's why I'm struggling. I don't need this other guy to like me back, I just need to get this out of my system! Guys go through this too. It just so happens that I'm the guy in the relationship. Well, a good mix of both actually. That's why it's also hard to be where I am. Coz I'm so encurbed by the society and the norms and such! So expect I'll be thrown rocks at.. {way to add humor haha} Standing beside Gilly emphasizes my imperfections. These are just a few of my travails.
I like this other guy becoz he IS my ideal. I know I have a chance with him. But it'll never be. I'm still into him. What can I do?
You'd think by now you're as hard as a rock... *sigh*
I hate him.. well, scratch that.. hate is a strong word... lemme just say it's really annoying what he's doing! i am referring to another "him" this time, not my gilly. I love my gilly. soo much.. that's why i'm ranting about a certain jerk i just met..
here's the scoop..
At first i thought it was just some lame excuse to get over his sadistic girl.. turns out he's a real player.. he play the game well alright.. and he plays the male version of a damsel in distress.. He'll get close to you and open up to you as if he's just being a sincere, sweet guy.. But that's just his bait, when you get caught off-guard he'll reel you in like a perfect catch.. what a dud! And I thought i was being nice.. I almost fell for it.. Something about him triggered my weakness.. Like I'm regressing or something! I hate it. but kudos he's good at it.. It's just sad.. how his gf must feel and all.. having a super flirty bf.. Any girl would develop paranoia..
On the up side of things...
I feel really lucky and again it proved how gilly & i are meant for each other *mush* haha I told gilly about this cocky jerk and I'm so proud of him for being mature about it, he didn't get mad at me. He just gave me some good advice and warned me about those kinds of guys. Felt a bit weird though! as if i was talking to my bestfriend. hehe
Hmmm... I'm glad he trusts me.. and I trust him..
I just hate the fact that flirty dude didn't think about the friendship, since we work together and all.. I found out he flirts with all the girls in the office.. Some news..
SM Mall of Asia A veneto for dinner Movie: Twilight Bowling
We watched Twilight to see what the fuss is about, all in all i give the movie a 60% rating. Pwede na! Yung mismong story though, parang tanga lang din. hehe Pero it's too cheesy talaga, but to me really funny! Gilly and I are just wondering- what's with Bella? I mean, she's not exactly jaw-droppingly gorgeous. She's not that interesting and she's not that edgy. She's actually next to ordinary. But oh well, I guess there's just something about her blood. hehe What about Edward? hmm Yummy!! haha I'm such a girl! I like his vampy look- fierce eyes, white skin, red lips.... And yeah, I guess the fact that he's centuries old! hehe No we're not buying the book or anything, we're good with the movie alone. No making epal in the twilight craze haha I love the scoring! Medyo na-hook ako sa music :) To sum it up, it's an exaggerated version of gossip girl with vampires. {Walang gawa sa Let the Right One In}
er shi pa:
It's actually our 4th year anniversary, Gilly and I. We've been through so much, it's almost a cliche. hehe Just to share our bliss...
So......... balik call center muna ko. Di ko naman minamaliit ang call centers at mga agents, if anything naiinis lang ako sa mga agents na napakayabang. Tipong kesho malaki sweldo at may american accent eh kung umasta akala mo antas. Unconsciously nakukuha na nila ang ugaling arogante ng mga kano. {pero xmpre hindi lahat ng kano ganon.}
Masaya sa bagong work ko. Kasi bukod sa hindi pa taxed ang sweldo dahil trainees palang, masaya mga kasama ko. Diverse, smart people and most of them are just waiting for something kaya nag-call center muna in the meantime. I'm happy rin kasi nakakapag-brush up ulit ako sa english skills ko. Hindi kasi ako technical writer eh, i don't give a rat's ass about punctuation marks.. hehe Whatever sounds good yun ang ginagamit ko, and syempre since writing for me is an art medyo malayo talagang makulong ako sa teknikal na pagsusulat.
About the other job i was waiting for......... It's something i could really stick with long term, kaso unfortunate ang nangyari dahil tanggap nga ako nagkaron naman ng changes sa management nila. Nagkaron ng reshuffle ek-ek... Long story short- biglang hindi na nila need ng tao, and since ayaw din nila ng over-employed hindi nila kinuha yung mga pumasa. Pero magkakaron ulit sila ng bagong projects and promised me that they'll hire me as soon as dumating na mga yun.
Napipicture ko na sarili ko as a financial analyst... tsk tsk nabitin pa hehe
Grabe super likot na ni uzuri, i took her to our clan's mauseleum today and boy was she hyper! Kalikutan stage na talaga ng batang to. Nakakatuwa and nakakapagod. Hassle lang kasi i had a pulsating headache, it's the worst since last year. Grabe ang kapal ng tao sa cemetery and yung mga naka-apartment ang mga patay sa may gate ng mauseleo namin nakaupo. Syempre si sofie {aka uzuri} nakikibarkada sa mga nakaupo hehe She took a seat beside the teenagers and tuwa naman sa kanya ang mga dalagito't dalagita. lol I prayed for papa of course, matagal-tagal ko narin hindi naipagdasal si papa. I dreamt of him na naman without anticipating this holiday. Actually I always dream of him when an ocassion' s about to come up. Nung broke ako napanaginipan ko sya, he was handing over some money! haha Papa talaga, basta makatulong kahit anong paraan gagawin hehe Kaso paggising ko syempre wala akong money on hand kasi nga dream lang. But what's eerie about it {and really twas a blessing in disguise}, was when a letter from prudential came saying I can claim some amount of money kasi scholar nila ako. Si papa kasi nag-avail nung education plan na yun, so in a way it was connected to my dream. Hehe coincidence? What a very good twist of fate, huh? :D
If there's anything to mourn about it's just me missin gilly...................
May mga pagkakataon na pagsisisihan mo ang mga nangyari, ang mga nagawa mo, mga nasabi... Pero sa huli maiisip mo parin na kung hindi nangyari ang mga nangyari, kung hindi mo nagawa ang mga nagawa mo, kung hindi mo nasabi ang mga nasabi mo- magiging kasinglakas ka ba tulad ng sa ngayon? Marami na akong mapagdaanan, marami na akong nakilala, at dahil sa mga iyon alam ko na marami na akong nalalaman. Ngunit kahit kailan ay hindi ito magiging sapat upang aking masabi na natutunan ko na ang lahat ng dapat kong matutunan. Ang mawalan ng isang mahal sa buhay sa hindi natural na paraan, ang dumaan sa isang unos na hindi naiintindihan ng ilan, ang batuhin ang walang humpay na panghuhusga, ang magmahal ng sobra ngunit kulang pa... Matagal narin akong nagkulong sa mundong mas maiintindihan ng karamihan- ang normal, ang tama lang, ang pag- exist ng hindi malaya. Ang pagkomporme sa isang estadong tanging maaarok ng madla. Sa mundong to, at sa uri ng mga taong nabubuhay dito- hindi talaga nababagay ang kasabihang "be yourself"..
Sa mga nangyari sakin, sa mga nalaman ko ayon sa ilang taong pagoobserba sa mundong ginagalawan ko, ang pagiging ikaw ay hindi sapat. Maralit ito'y sobra pa, sobra sa kayang himayin ng mga utak ng mga tao. Hindi ko sinasabing ako ay mataas, at lalong hindi ko sinusumpa sa bato na ako ang pinakamalalim- hindi ito paligsahan. Wari ko lang ay malaman ito ng lahat, upang mabawasan {kung hindi man tuluyang mapuksa} ang mga bagay na sisira lamang sa ating kaligayahan.
Sa mga taong nakikipagunahan na malaman ang mga katotohanan ng buhay- good luck. Hindi ito contest. Hindi mo kailangang magpretend na mature ka na at naiintindihan mo ang pinagdadaraanan ng iba. Dahil hindi mo alam...
Sa mga taong takot makipagugnayan- goodluck din. Walang nanalong duwag sa laban ng katapangan.
Sa mga taong mistulang bato- Katulad mo ang duwag. Matuto kang harapin ang emosyon na itinalaga sayo. Dito ka rin naman matututo.
finding yourself in glass pieces a mosaic of your own determent you served your precious time only for a moment you lie you lie to me as you lie awake with me weakness a promise you never thought you'd end up in a ruined apartment complex
i was just a visitor visiting hours is over ask the shadows of my past i wasn't the one you thought i was a carcass a circus you tell every lie you cannot tell a ray of sun you thought you're done an air of your only hope up there your words unspoken
a letter on the table in this cheap ran down motel cracked wall papers mute witness a letter named for you in block letters it read your heart what it meant
jumped in your wrecked mauped drifting as your life passes you away battling with a traffic of thoughts the lights weren't there to guide you not anymore.. not anymore..
wehey.. The new job is going to be night operations and I'm sure people will ask "call center?" hahaha nope.. I wont elaborate anymore...
Lately I've been having flashbacks of angst and sonic ugliness of the past. I hate it. I just had to snap out of it, and good thing I was able to. Again, I refuse to elaborate. *sigh*
I can't relate enough to Yael Naim's "New soul", yes it's used for the new mac air commercial {you know, where the mac air is inserted inside a manila envelope? haha}. If you're not familiar here's a gist {or the whole song rather}.. lol
New Soul
I'm a new soul I came to this strange world Hoping I could learn a bit 'bout how to give and take But since I came here, felt the joy and the fear Finding myself making every possible mistake
La, la, la, la (21x) La, la, la, la (21x)
See I'm a young soul in this very strange world Hoping I could learn a bit 'bout what is true and fake But why all this hate? try to communicate Finding trust and love is not always easy to make
La, la, la, la (21x) La, la, la, la (21x)
This is a happy end Cause you don't understand Everything you have done Why' s everything so wrong
This is a happy end Come and give me your hand I'll take you far away
I'm a new soul I came to this strange world Hoping I could learn a bit 'bout how to give and take But since I came here, felt the joy and the fear Finding myself making every possible mistake
New soul... (la, la, la, la,...) In this very strange world... Every possible mistake Possible mistake Every possible mistake Mistakes, mistakes, mistakes...
***************************************
Yes, I am a new soul. Again, trying to reinvent myself for the nth time. Trying to forgive the past, and everytime i try i never fail to bake a fresh batch of mistakes..
I'm a bit in a cliffhanger situation right now. I'm waiting for the result of my application in -----. hehe {cge i-ccliffhanger ko din kayo}. I had my final interview thru skype coz the new president is still in vietnam. I just hope that ifever i get considered I'll be working on the dayshift, kasi kung hindi parang nag-call center narin ako hehe Natutuwa narin akong mabilis ang processing kasi the day after my first interview and exam, final interview na agad. Thanks din to mr. goodboy sa mga tips and hints! hehe
I'm happy with how things are right now. It's slowly smoothing out and I know gilbert is loving me more. :) Though I still object with some things, things that someone else should own up to. May mga tao lang talagang stubborn, I'm just hoping na matuto narin sila. Sila rin ang may kailangang matutunang leksyon. At least I was able to confide with a wise person, wise kasi oldy na talaga hindi nagmamarunong na neneng. Anyways, I don't hate anyone in any way naman, I guess I just got disappointed kasi nga I felt betrayed and amplastik naman talaga whichever way you put it.
sha sha.. I don't mean to bash anyone anymore. Eto talaga yung example ng freedom of expression lang, hindi yung simpleng parinig tapos pag nakompronta eh ijjustify yung mali...
I got a text message (and 4missed calls) from Ms. Cheri, the HR associate who interviewed me for Axis Global. I think I may have a chance to be hired as a Corporate Accounts/ Development Officer. I thought maybe I wasn't considered since it's been days since I last heard from them. The final interview will be scheduled pa since I'm gonna be interviewed by the President of the company himself. whew* nervous* haha He's out of the country daw so wait nalang ako for the schedule. At least I'm for final interview na. Sana tanggap na, para pipili nalang ako. hooray! Yesterday i emailed my resume naman sa co-member ni Gilbert sa HCP. He's from San Miguel naman and he'll help me daw. Sana magustuhan naman ako ng HR for the marketing department, magkaron man lang sana ako ng chance hehe I'm not desperate or anything, kung tutuusin it's not that hard to get a job eh, mahirap mahanap yung career na gusto mo. I can't map my career path if I don't even have a gist where I wanna go or what I wanna be.
*sigh* I just hope matanggap narin ako sa Axis, ok na yun kung tutuusin. Ire-reimburse din nila phone bill ko eh :) {isa lang yan sa mga benefits}
Hooray, i won 2 tickets to the advance screening of The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants 2! hehe It's gonna be held on September 22, 2008/ monday, 8pm at cinema 6 Powerplant Mall, Rockwell Makati. Have no idea who I'm gonna watch it with since my bestfriend has work that night, my boyfriend is preoccupied and my other friends are plain busy. hehe May iba naman hindi trip yung movie, maganda kaya yun! :) Oh well, I posted a contest on my multiply. I hope somebody wins hehe (syempre for friends lang yun! hehe di qualified mga strangers hehe)
In this entry, I am letting it all out in the open.
And by "it" I mean my resignation.
I took the job for 2 reasons, and two reasons alone- one, because I need money for my baby, and two- because I had to. If you think about it, it can be considered as one and the same. But in my sense it's not. Anyway, I have been struggling with a lot of things in my life and I realized that adding another load wouldn't help. In order for me to be a better person, mom and wife, I must first serve my time in my cell so I can finally figure out what I really want to be and where I want to go.
I've always wanted the free-spirit-tag, I mean if there's any label you'd give me it might as well be "free-spirit". Being a slave in the corporate world isn't really for me. I understand rules, policies and regulations and abide and comply my ass to them. Plus I've always envied acquaintances / friends who swims in the creative ocean. It's always been my idea of a "comfort zone". Though I also want stability not just for me but also for my baby, I can't really afford to go experimental on money-making- not now, not ever. But it's a risk I have to take. I need to get a taste of it since I've been craving it for quite some time now. I wish I can find a job that will serve me just that. I don't feel all confident right now since I know I'm not fully equipped with the tools of the trade, but I can learn and it's never too late.
Alam kong pag nalaman to ng nanay ko (hindi to paranoia or walang-basehang agam-agam) iisipin na naman na di ako tumagal, wala akong tiyaga, o batugan akong tunay. Ngunit aking sinasaisip ang posibilidad na hindi lamang niya ito lubusang naiintindihan dahil hindi niya ito naranasan {pasintabi nalang, hindi ko sya kinukutya}. Ang sakin lang, alam ko na ang trabaho ay hindi isang larong-bata na pag sapit ng kulimlim at mistulan nang trapo ang mga kamiseta ng mga kalaro ay uuwi na ako at magpapahinga sa buong araw na paglalaro. Lalu pa't ngayon na meron na kong anak {dependent ika nga sa TAX hehe} alam kong wala akong karapatang magpahinga o magsawa. At hindi, hindi sawa ang salarin. Isang simpleng realisasyon ang tanging nag-udyok sa aking desisyon. Wala akong pinagsisisihan, "it felt right" kumbaga.
Kung meron man akong pag-aalangan ngayon ito ay ang kakulangan saking kaalaman, na kaya (at kung hindi man), kakayanin kong alamin. Kailangan kong maging ganap na ambisyosa. hehe So ano ba talaga ang gusto ko? Sikretong malupit. bwahaha kung nagbabasa kang talaga andaming clues. Umupo ka muna sa iyong thinking chair kung di mo nagets at isulat sa iyong handy-dandy notebook ang mga clues. hehehe
note to self: "Tama na ang pakikinig sa iba, mas sasaya ka kung makikinig ka sa sarili mo. Dahil ikaw lang ang nakakaalam kung ano ang gusto mo sa buhay."
Wow. Nakakatuwa naman, I just checked my email and I have an employer request from lina_emprequest already. Ibig sabihin nito ay may company na nag-view ng resume mo at interesado silang pag-apply-in ka. At dahil pi-n-requalify ka ng company mas mataas ang chances na kunin ka nila. :) I don't know what Xoom AutoGas is all about yet, but they're interested in me applying as a Marketing/ Business Development Officer. The job description goes something like; "Shall be tasked to create marketing programs and strategies to increase awareness of the public about the business. Shall create key accounts and open business opportunities in all industry connected with automobiles". Gusto ko ata to.. XD
I just checked out the company profile and it's a bit interesting. I just hope the offer will be within my expectations hehe If not- there are other better jobs :) we'll see..
This morning, I said to myself; "it's friday, and it's my last day..." I cried bcoz I got touchy yesterday with my boss and got a little emotional today with my team. It's funny how I get attached to people I don't know well. Anyway, on to my next job! I loved working in HSBC, but it's not for me. The job itself is not for me. I felt a sense of relief when I filed my resignation today. It's official- I am jobless! hahahaha Nah. I will find a better path, one that will suit me and one that I'll love more. Of course now that I've been with a top bank corporation my work value climbed a notch, and I'm proud of myself :) Hello higher pay hehehe
My gawd!!!! I'm really harassed this week.... I need to go out on saturday night, is all i need i swear.. i've been trying to pull up my numbers, and gawd am i exhausted! stoic!!! stoked!!! Lahat na... Let the all the ranting metaphors boil down on me! I just can't stand the unnecessary sungit- technique of some people. Badtrip lang lalo kasi may mga taong kesho matagal na eh nag-popower trip.. oh my gawd.. and i thought may pinag-aralan at modo mga tao dito... actually marami naman professionals eh, ang problema marami rin ang hindi. I hate superiority especially when it gets out of hand. How can other peopl work if there are jerks hogging the workstation, or making you move over when they need to use the computer. Go find your own! It's just so annoying, first come first served nga eh dba.!? Senior na nga parang di naman makaintindi. I'm not the only one pestered. I'm speaking in behalf of 4 confirmed victims. I'm not exactly bullied, my co-newbie is. Kung utusan kala mo PA. Tama ba yun? Kung sakin gawin yun d ako papautos, i'll joke about it but i wont do what they say.. favors are different from commandering... There's no "fine line" between them. period!
♥♥♥♥ hey hey hey.. ♥♥♥♥ I've been hogging the computer the whole day and my head is spinning. I'm waiting for gilbert {as usual}... I can't count the times I've waited for him. I've collected enough magazines to fill up a rack just because i needed something to read while I pass time waiting for him. For example, last thursday night at Gateway mall. He needed to meet up with the buyer of his logica speakers in Novaliches, I had to wait for him at gateway starbucks in araneta circle. I passed by a magazine stand at the MRT station while talking to him and realizing I'll be waiting {again}, I decided to buy a back issue of Entrepreneur magazine, since I've been researching on SME's plus Rajo Laurel's Rugs Bags are on the issue. I craved for a caramel cream and sat my ass on a wooden chair. I hate them woodedn chairs in starbucks, especially when I'll be waiting for an hour or more! I can't find meself a couch! gurrrr... I read the magazine from cover to cover but still gilbert isn't even on his way to meet me yet. I did some of my work and even snoozed for minutes. tick tock...... at last gilbert texted; saying his on his way na...
Oh the torture... 8( But then again i'm the one asking a favor so i had no right to rant that time. He arrived 4omins after and coming in he said; "andyan yung ex ni R******" grinning. I said; "talaga? san? sino dun si *******". After the chikka minute we talked for a while and he made fun of the gay couple on the next table talking about gay stuff and the launching of the PSP w/c according to gay guy #1, is touch screen. Of course I made saway but laughed getting his humor.
On the way to the MRT station he pointed to a girl in front of us, he was claiming it was G***. But since I was previously obsessing {yes, inaamin ko na!!!} on this young chic, I knew it wasn't her. But now that I think about it, I guess it WAS her. But oh well, I'm over her. I think I need to explain myself on the obsessing thing.. Lately I've been viewing a girl's online account {I'm not gonna mention if it's friendster or multiply, or both hehe}, but only because I deal with insecurities a different way. Some girls/ ladies/ bitches deal with their insecurities by backstabbing, hating, commenting rudely, criticizing etc those girls who look better than they do. But moi? I admire. No i'm no lesbo, and I know I have my own appeal. But something about this girl reminds me of my young self. I don't look as good as her but I guess it's just the missing-the-good-old-days drama that got me a little hooked up on her. Gilly on the otherhand gets the satisfaction when he teases me that i'm attracted to a girl haha. The girl is actually an ex of his friend's, and was gilly's schoolmate in highschool. So there, I can say that I'm proud of myself for not looking too foolish getting all insecure and whatever. I love my life, no matter how complicated it may get. XD xoxo ♥♥♥♥♥hahahahahahaha!!!! ♥♥♥♥♥
I love work! hehe yes i do -oooh- ooohh! hehe ulet. I love the fact that everything is reimbursible- from transportation to medicines, to consultations to phonebills!!! *sigh* wala lang. I just realized (again) that I'm blessed to be working in a multinational bank and that I am a bank officer in a flash. no need to play the teller part, no need to wait for the bosses to err- die before you get promoted.... *sigh again* I was idle for many mommy-months and yet HSBC took me in and made me part of their family. hahaha drama crap... My teammates are great, i have lots of fun with them even when we're harassed with work. I love the fact that I bought 2 parker pens hehe! engraved xmpre, nakiki-parker na ko haha One for gilly and one for me.. corporate na corporate! weehoo! Best part of work is actually-- after work, when I come home to my uzuri... ♥ That's the best part. I don't feel tired, she makes mommy's booboo' s in life go away.. :) I love it when she says "dede!" hehe she's so cute with teeny voice and her teeny mouth and her teeny hands (yes, lahat na teeny kahit anlaki ng pata at tummy nia! sabi nga ni gilly- parang butete!!wahaha)
Nag-aya sina jom mag- G4 kanina, pero nacancel din, hehe di na talaga matuloy bonding with the batchmates complete. There's always a next time. Saturday night I'll be out with my ol' girls.. Chacha needs us. hoohoo Mahirap talaga buhay may asawa.. masaya na mahirap... na masaya... na mahirap... na masaya.. hehe Daan lang kame sa bday ni caloi then batsi na sa gurlz night out! yes, kulang kame ng isa.. hmm sino kaya yun? oh well, i don't feel like being with her.. sorry haha i have to admit i'm still a bitch sometimes.. a more mature bitch! hehe we have to learn to choose our battles.. hindi talaga lahat worth my time para patulan. we all have to learn, right? especially when you think you know everything... that's the time when you have to snap out of it and think again.. coz you don't know everything... nakakahiya naman if you claim something that only makes you foolish.. :)
I forgot to say how my jaw dropped for "the dark knight". Bruce Wayne had the greatest sacrifice of all, being misjudged and all, and still being the protagonist. The joker is so manipulative that he got the whole city of Gotham to think twice about saving themselves and becoming criminals.. The movie was smooth and batman's voice- was.. err- a little funny. hehe It was Heath Ledger's best and last performance and i'm asking for an encore! I wanna watch the movie again. It was a fun night for me and gilly at trinoma, before watching the movie we headed to timezone first and got our picture taken at what-seemed-like a simpler version of neoprint (and funniest bcoz of the english translation hehe it was obviously chinese kinda like a chinglish episode haha "choose the picture which interests you".. etc ) We played time crisis , the usual... and no! we don't do that "i'll win this life-size stuff toy for you na mas malaki pa syo" kind of thing! haha we shoot hoops, be like idiots and have fun. After the dummy-proof arcade thing we pigged out a bit at mrs. field's, we shared a bar of Rocky Mountain Mogul which is the best sin of all and went inside the movie house only to find out that yael (and the whole spongecola gang) is seated beside me. yes, yael is on my right side, getting all squimish when the joker seemed like he's gonna slit someone's face. Gilly was nudging me, making fun of me saying "naks, i'm with the band" hahaha and all i can do is smirk and feel like a groupie, but no i'm not into them. It just feels a bit weird sitting with famous people who used to be unpopular, who used to be watched by gilly when they weren't swimming in the mainstream yet. Even if i'm given the chance to sit beside a band i like, i guess i would just set them aside. That's how good the movie was. That's how awed i was (and still am) with The Dark Knight.
I' m on sick leave today.. by dose is as itchy as ever.. translation? my nose is as itchy as ever! I keep on sneezing nonstop. If i were to take antihistamines i'd doze off. hmmm
On friday gilly and I will be attending a wedding. It's our first ever. Kakilig naman he invited me hehe It's his client's wedding daw. He' s so good at what he does he gets invited to such events. He was surprised nga daw when he got an invitation he thought it was sent wrong. Anyway, I need to don a bolero for my tube dress. yihii :)
Work has been great and fun. Our team's stats are at it's highest and I have this feeling i' ll reach my goal! :) Malapit na kami ma-regularize! Gilly and I are doing good. Happy and growing stronger. I't s fun being a bank officer with the benefits, friends, perks of the work itself... *sigh*
I loved how my bday turned out.
July 12, 2008
footspa - a day alone - inuman with my oldest, closest friends
fun fun fun! at Uzuri's first bday.. Sure there were mishaps but they' re bareable. Thanks to those who made it {and thanks to those who didn't choose pacquiao over us! hehe} :)
This is one of the things i don't need right now... but heck, it's like a have a choice.
I've been okay with my new job at a reputable company-slash-bank regardless how tiring and (at times, demeaning) it can get. What i need to rant about though, is my tan-ta-na-nan!!!! My boss. *I know, i can "hear" eyebrows raising & eyes popping out at this very moment.* Lakas ba ng loob ko? Well, this is just me being risky, no, say it as "riskey" lol It's just that i get annoyed at unnecessary things because they are unnecessary. Like when I started turning in applications, she said out loud- "(name of a colleague), turuan mo si donna mag-turn in! di pa sya marunong!" When i say "out loud" i mean rinig-ng-12 floor-na-puno-pa-ng-tao-dahil-maaga-pa kind of thing!! Napangiti nalang ako, sa ewan. Ewan kasi usually magtataray ako or magco-comment pero this time i had to hold it in. lol Okay, so mababaw pa yun.
Pero another office "don't" kasi ay ang mga gossips!!! "hahahahahahahahaahahahahahaha" plus "badtrip lang kasi parang mga walang magawa sa buhay" ang tanging sumagi sa aking isipan nung finally nakapag-react nako regarding the issue brought up during one of our oh-so-early team huddles! Mantakin mo nga naman. Kabago-bago ko eh na-chismis na ang lola! It's just funny when you think about it, kasi ba naman i always tag along with my colleague/batchmate Algel, and to maliscious minds eh issue na yun. May maririnig nalang akong "oo nga bakit ba madalas kayong magkasama nun?", "alam mo bang naiintriga na kayo?", "honga! nung sales dance pa yun dba?","aah, yun pala yung tinatanong sakin nina BLANK, sino ba yung parating kasama ni Algel?!".... Haaay... Sa aga ng huddle na yon di ako nakapag-react ng normal. I mean kung pano talaga ako usually nag-rereact sa mga ganung eksena. Mataray kasi ako, i find it fun for me when i throw retorts with sarcasm. Pero since ang aga nga at nananaginip pa ko, all i blurted out was "ah, hehe wala lang. sus."
Pagdating sa bahay, napagtanto ko ang scenario na yon at nanghinayang dahil di ko man lang na-redeem sarili ko. But oh well, wala naman din kasi akong dapat ika-react that will satisfy their whims kasi Algel is a mere colleague, na mabait na masarap alaskahin dahil di napipikon. Nung sales dance kasi we went home ng sabay, why??? kasi Gilbert picked me up, sumabay si Algel and we dropped him off at Boni since he lives nearby. I wanted them to meet din kasi, why, again?? Kasi it's chismis-prone nga for a guy and a girl to be together, eh kaso hindi naman nakita nung iba si gilbert nung sinundo niya ako. *darn it* haha Anyway, kaya din kasi kame ang magkasama nun eh kasi team nila at team namen ang nag-combine to compete with other combined teams and since batchmates kame, malamang!!! kame ang magkasama. I don't get it. Kala ko kasi people inside the "corporate world" are more professional and appropriate, but i thought wrong pala.
In a way, i get it. Siguro kasi they're bored with their lame lives, or it's their way of unwinding. hehe I wont do that, I can't relax at other people's expense. Lalo na kung nakakawalang respeto sa ganung paraan. I tend to disrespect other people {not entirely intentional} because it's my lousy way of making a point. Pero to gossip or make stories about people around me? No way! All of this got me thinking- when i used to work for a call center/BPO, wala akong na-encounter na ganito, to think that a big percentage of people there didn't finish college due to numerous reasons, compared to what i'v experienced so far with my current job, nagtaka lang ako. Again, I am reminded that we don't learn everything from school. CSR's get belittled when not all of them are lowlives or jerks, or mayabang just coz they get good pay. As from the people who raised gossips- I expected more from them. Mga galing sa reputtable schools pa naman. Ako nga lang ata galing ceu dun eh. Get the picture?
Haaay... Sabi lang nina Algel at Jom, "hehe wag mo pansinin yun, hayaan mo na. gulat lang sila kasi may kasama kang artista" nyieh.
I've no words for him at all.. i lost everything when i lost my spirit. it has gone with him.. I don't know if i 'll be able to move on like before. it's hard to soldier on when you've ran out of ammo. I need to reload. *sigh*
I'm no longer in the blogging mood. I guess I've finally ran out of things to say... though I've been thinking about tons of things.. I can't even remember them when I wake up. Oh well, i'ts time for a recap....
- been real busy with work since we hit the streets to sell, happy with work though.. even sans the perks! (but it's heaven when the perks are there!)
- i love having Italianni's as my client. I get free dalandan juice/ iced tea everytime I pay a visit.. {imagine, dalandan juice/ iced tea costs like Php120 somethings..} I even got tuscan bread from Lj.thanks dude!
- It's not that easy to hit the quota, we screen the applicants before they can even apply. sorry to those who belong to the marginal bucket, you need to have credit cards from other banks w/c are at least a year old. tsk.tsk
- Some friends can't be relied on, they only exist when you exist to help them. sorry, no time for you anymore. matulog ka nalang siguro. For people who work the night shifts, crucial ang sleep. hehe Sleep is you new bestfriend! haha
- sofie's bday is fast- approcahing i need to get a final plan na. My first option is Shakey's El Pueblo, since it's accessible to guests from either north or south. But when i checked the place out, it's too small to accomodate a hundred people. Next on the list is Mcdonald's el pueblo, the place is big, the theme "i love!" {disney fairies}, chracter appearance is free, but.... the food??/ i don't know... I'm having second- no- triple thoughts about it.. I need a place and a caterer! deadline is next week!
- yay for ate's balikbayan box!! At last it came na! hooray.. hehe i got a new showergel from bodyshop, plum=yum! i so love the scent. Sofie got new jelly shoes, clothes and toys, and showergels and lotions too! hehe i love free stuff!
i feel sad for those who forgot me. i feel sorry for those who think they can push me over... Now that you seem to be needing me.... all i can do is feel sorry for you.. mapagmalaki ka kasi eh.. kala mo naman CEO ka..hehe
Oh yes, weekends are the best but if you're a mom like me missing a daughter, you'd be a little more hurt and sore at those people who only think of you as a young irresponsible mother. tsk.tsk.
I am a bit irked with gilly ranting all the time. It's official that i am in dire need of driving lessons- and a mint condition car! He's always complaining about traffic and how tiring it is to drive back and fort every weekends. We don't do that anymore. My mom said I have and need to understand him bcoz it is tiring to drive that long {with SLEX under construction and all} so then I understand. Even if it means I wont get to see Uzuri on a regular basis, even if it means more unpleasant comments will come my way, and even if it means getting fed up of tolerating his lame life. I've done things more exhausting than driving, I've been through troubles more tiring than work. Howcome he complains like this? People around me, especially my mum, tells me to understand Gilly, that he's kawawa for so many reasons, kaya wag ko daw awayin. She tells me she's not siding with anyone in any way but the way i see it- she is. Gilbert is always the one who's "kawawa", eventhough I'm the one away from my daughter. They always think of me as someone selfish and self- centered, what they don't realize is that I've learned to stand on my own thus I've learned to rely on myself alone, I need to take care of myself coz nobody else will. Ako para sa sarili ko. That kind of thing. How is that selfish when I'm only doing what any adult should? They should be proud of me being this way but as it turns out, they're not. So yeah, Gilbert is kawawa when I get mad at him, it's only in good sense that I have the right to be mad because he'd done something that caused me to go berserk. *sigh* Ako yung masama kesho ako yung mattapang. Ako yung hindi marunong umintindi kesho ayoko mag- tolerate. Ako yung buhay- dalaga at masarap daw buhay ko kasi wala sakin anak ko... fuck.
I miss my baby, only I don't wanna cry everytime. I guess in order for people to believe you are hurt, they should see you sob.. How stupid.
grabe. Kailangan ng cuss word if you're gonna describe the movie "ironman". Parang first time ko magwatch ng movie hehe It's really good. Gilbert and I went to see it last night (april30) at sm megamall, cinema 6. The last full show was at 9pm-11 something. Aside from Toni Stark's hot bod and hot cars (audi R8 and S5 coupe), this billionaire has a mind of a genius and his character still maintained his feet on the ground. He runs his business with a heart and acted as if his not the most superior being on earth. Gawd! I love him haha Talk about my ideal man hmm :) I wanna watch again!
Gilly and I checked out units at Manors a while ago. Prices range from 2.7M - 3.2M. I want a house not a condo unit. I told him I really wanted to don a car first, i wanted to drive since I was in highschool. I can drive an A/T already {who can't anyways? hehe} I just need lessons. Kanina we were driving along UP, actually I was driving! {yeah he let me take the wheel!! hehe} hehe I missed Up talaga, i still am a junkie by heart. I missed everything about it. Sometimes tambay lang kame ni gilly dun, sa Sunken, anywhere! Kain ng siomai, barbecue, sometimes with mat being the 3rd wheel. Kaso it rained so we needed to scoot- off. Later we'll visit Sam' s dad's internment at Loyola Memorial at Guadalupe. I don't know the cause of death but later we'll find out.
I'll miss my uzuri. I wont be seeing her over the weekends.. Oh well, Ty and I will go out tomorrow night, I'm thinking- let loose and get miyeh...a little drunk :) Sometimes booze keeps me sane.
if only i had the power again to make her move the way i want to.. she has her own pace now.. she has her own world.. i made a monster out of her.. she made a monster out of me.. which am i in the picture?
Been a bit busy lately and things have been going on. haha I can't wait to do field work- i mean it's not exactly 26 degrees out there but hey we're in the Philly, life's like this. ;) I' ve been having second thoughts on my Uzuri's bday venue. Shakey's El Pueblo seems too small of a place to cram in a minimum of 80 people! haha i guess if they're all sitting down, space is no problemo..hmm
Having crushes is a highschool thing, i know, but it gives me a natural high (and i know i need one!). It gives me a sense of guilt when i tell my boyfriend about my crushes it's a way to back off from temptation haha. Coz the more i tell my boyfriend about it the more guilt i feel. Anyways, it's a harmless crush so screw it.
Last night pala we got home late coz we faced the worst traffic ever! Baby was in play mode when she woke up so it was sorry-mommy-you-have-to-play-too time for me. i was dead tired. Gilly was stoked driving, i didn't sleep on the way so i could keep him from nodding off.
I' m going to go out of my comfort zone and enter that Petron Art contest. Winning is an understatement, risking to lose is the deal. I just want to experience the heck of it.
i will keep you in my heart. locked up. but you're no prisoner. we are different in the most obvious ways. we live in the same world, yet.. we don't. we are the world's biggest irony. if we choose to part, i' ll still keep you close to my heart..
and so it goes for all that we are and we are not.. We cannot keep our lives going like it used to. Things happen, we change. Of all all the things i have in my life, you are the hell i love. Drifting back into heaven, is drifting back to you. Just like all the quotes and love songs, all will become cliches, but they'll always be true. I lose myself every once in a while and it's true i become a monster. I'm sorry. I ran out of things to say. I can't even write like i used to. I've been robbed by my senses.
i seldom dream of my dad, but when i do somethin' always happens the next day..
i'm close to being broke since payday is not until the next month {i wont say when!hehe}. i got home 10:30 last night, went down to the basement to see the new bebe boy, blogged, showered, wen to sleep. i slept soundly, i love my room and i missed it as i missed my old self.. then i dreamt of my dad. he was radiating a very light happy aura. he was wearing his tennis outfit and he looked so illuminated. and then- he gave me money! haha i don't know why but he did. i guess it's his way of helping out. i just realized it's quite funny. i wont share this to my family. they'll just go- "uhhhh, okay haha".
when i woke up at 11am i went straight to the comfort room to check myself and do my morning wee-thing, my grandparents, together w/ my tita madre {my dad's older sister who's a nun}, were downstairs talking about my dad. They were visiting the new baby but everything always ends up with chats about my dad and the eerie coincidences that happened or happens . One example was during the holy week, my tito tets was putting up the curtains inside the karo w/c my dad used to do. my uncle couldn't figure out how to put it up then he said to himself ;"kuya ikaw gumagawa nito, pano ba 'to?" then when he looked up there was a sign pala that says "start here".. *sigh*
eto nga pla new hair ko bwahahaha! ayan na.. narcissism is consuming me.. hehe kidding.
c/o bambi of fix salon podium. from enterprise makati to podium hinabol ko ang oras at nagmistulan akong alipin sa metro ng pasimpleng abusong driver ng taxi. hati kame ni algel sa cab fare kaya keri lang. papasok ako ng door ng biglang palabas pala si sam milby. yes, this entry is actually a portal to sam milby's fan site! fat chance! hehe hindi ako mahilig sa mga taartits pero gwapo pala talaga sya. too bad if he really is gay.. anyway, he was holding a couple of shirts (i think) in his hands while waving goodbye to the super kilig na staff ng bench (yes moron, bench, dahil sa podium nasa loob ng bench ang fix salon). i was a bit caught off-guard. bwahaha watdakakk. i said "hi" out loud! oh dba, parang day off lang ni inday. he said "hi" back naman. hayun lang. ang highlight ng entry ay ang picture. hahahaha here's another one; {i'm just happy with the result! thanx bambi nilibre mo pa ako ng cut!}
haha naextra sa pa si telly talong. yan ang outlet na tinakpan ko ng unfinished painting (kuno*) wahaha oh well..
i'm missin' someone.. someone whom i used to call sikita or shakti..
i had so much in my mind i was planning to blog about, but i' m too bugged to even start. first off, i need to say that i hate pa-cool people. hehe especially those who are trying the hardest to send their asses off to cool school. here i am again, hating hahahaha nah, i just need to get this off my chest. i'm really not used to certain kinds of people. i'm just a simple being, a free- spirit to say the least. i love being naturally happy, with real people who don't give a rat's ass about being elite, popular or famous. who am i pertaining to?? hmmm nevermind. hahaha go figure!
anyways, here are some shots from the office.. "some" talaga kasi sobrang konti hehe
this was taken last saturday. the bum day. {khryssy, jom and cathy}
Wahaha kahit mini pool pinatulan! The weather is scorching hot kaya kahit mini pool eepal ako- kame pala. hehe I bought it for 2k at megamall last friday, i finally got my moola! haha chip-in naman kame ni ate so magaan sya sa budget. hehe I'm proud to say that i got my cover-up from ukay eons ago.hehe ngayon ko lang nagamit. perfect! haha
proudly, i must say, that slowly i am making a comeback! hehe this is what i need to redeem myself. i'm happy and excited with my new job. habang tumatagal lalo sumasarap hehe aging like fine wine? happy din ako with my colleagues, it's a small world talaga coz my ol' classmate sandra's friend khryssy is my colleague. nakakatuwa coz she's no snob or mean girl. we'll try to shop together, how is she kaya as a shopping buddy? hehe next weekend i'll find out. hehe we have no choice but to shop for corporate clothes talaga. required mag-heels and all. patay ang aming mga footsies... hehe
i miss my babies.. hindi talaga ako kampante to leave my baby uzuri with the hands of a stranger (a.k.a yaya). i seldom get to see her. ika nga, "sacrifice for other people's happiness.." i'm ecstatic for her bday, even if it's still 2 months away. :)
holy week is actually an annual thing for my family. every year, the clan and other second to third degree relatives gather together for the preparation of the procession. The sponsor decorates the antique cart our family had inherited from our ancestors. this year lola min, my paternal grandfather's sister-in-law, is in charge of the flowers/ decorations. again, everyone awaits their share of sampaguita. the sweet scent is nostalgic, i'm sure we're all gonna be reminded of my dad, who always helps out in cleaning the karo regardless who the sponsor is.
speaking of sampaguita, i was taken back by tokyo bubble tea's jasmine milk tea w/ bubbles. gilly and i tried their mixed sushi and jasmine milk tea. it's not that pricey but if you compare it to teriyaki boy you'll find it quite affordable since it's not the usual japanese resto. Bubble Tea is actually a haven for japanese treats and desserts. they also have meals and sushi' s, maki' s and sashimi's, {and the wasabi i oh-so- love!}, but basically it is japanese comfort food in a new light. we shall return.. hehe
pardon me for the segue, i forgot to mention that we had a bite to eat there last weekend. going back to the holy week fuss, gilly, my hubby, will be joining us tomorrow for the first time. our karo is 2nd to the last in line of the procession, it's the glass cuffin where Jesus Christ lay. i'll post some pictures so you can witness the antiquity i love about it. it just tells so much story.
watch out for it guys. :) have a safe lenten season! (i can't exactly say "happy holy week", sans the main purpose of the ocassion. hehe)
from wilson/ trafficlikeme; Very interesting facts...
Easter is always the 1st Sunday after the 1st full moon after the Spring Equinox (which is March 20). This dating of Easter is based on the lunar calendar that Hebrew people used to identify passover, which is why it moves around on our Roman calendar.
Here's the interesting info. This year is the earliest Easter any of us will ever see the rest of our lives! And only the most elderly of our population have ever seen it this early (95 years old or above!). And none of us have ever, or will ever, see it a day earlier! Here's the facts:
1) The next time Easter will be this early (March 23) will be the year 2228 (220 years from now). The last time it was this early was 1913 (so if you're 95 or older, you are the only ones that were around for that!).
2) The next time it will be a day earlier, March 22, will be in the year 2285 (277 years from now). The last time it was on March 22 was 1818. So, no one alive today has or will ever see it any earlier than this year!
Yum-O!!!
i miss my alter ego..
c/o bambi of fix salon podium. from enterprise makati to podium hinabol ko ang oras at nagmistulan akong alipin sa metro ng pasimpleng abusong driver ng taxi. hati kame ni algel sa cab fare kaya keri lang. papasok ako ng door ng biglang palabas pala si sam milby. yes, this entry is actually a portal to sam milby's fan site! fat chance! hehe hindi ako mahilig sa mga taartits pero gwapo pala talaga sya. too bad if he really is gay.. anyway, he was holding a couple of shirts (i think) in his hands while waving goodbye to the super kilig na staff ng bench (yes moron, bench, dahil sa podium nasa loob ng bench ang fix salon). i was a bit caught off-guard. bwahaha watdakakk. i said "hi" out loud! oh dba, parang day off lang ni inday. he said "hi" back naman. hayun lang. ang highlight ng entry ay ang picture. hahahaha here's another one; {i'm just happy with the result! thanx bambi nilibre mo pa ako ng cut!}
haha naextra sa pa si telly talong. yan ang outlet na tinakpan ko ng unfinished painting (kuno*) wahaha oh well..
more pics at multiply..jpg)
this was taken last saturday. the bum day..jpg)
while waiting for gel's atm {powervantage babeh!}
eto...? wala lang.. wala pang caddy
post this pic on poopster- i mean friendster!
snowcone frenzy
for the sake of art
high kick w/ sponsor kicks..
uhm.. mr. president..
protective mum
